On the morning of Valentine's Day, I watched a party tent go up at my neighbor's house. I was curious to know what they were celebrating, so later that day, I poked my head in the tent and read the banner on the back wall which read, "Jose's First Year of Death," surrounded by stars, doves, and angels. I asked my host family about this and they explained that it is normal for families to hold a party at their home after a mass that is held on the 1 year anniversary of the death. I watched this unfold throughout the day and fell asleep to the music that was blasting from the 4 speakers they erected. Around noon, there was a crowd at the church; at about three when I went to my afternoon class, there was a small procession heading towards the cemetery; around dusk when I ran past, dinner had just been served and everyone was dancing and drinking. I found this all very intriguing.
A custom here that I've always found interesting is that family members who lose a loved one do not dance for 1 year from the date of death. This often means that they don't even go to parties during that first year. An older tradition that is less common is that survivors wear only black clothing for one year, no colors. So, at the end of this year, it is common for the family to hold a gathering in which they dance again for the first time. From what I gather, it varies on family and situation, but it seems to follow the same general pattern. No dancing for one year, then on the anniversary, there is a mass, a cemetery visit, then a gathering which can be anything from a somber meal to a big loud Peruvian party.
This is kind of a random thing, but it's interesting (and sort of new) to me so I thought I'd share.
Elia wore only black when I first had her as a professor, and someone (was it you? maybe!) told me later it was because her father had died. I think it's interesting how different people and cultures deal with death. Death in general is interesting. Morbid? Maybe. Memento mori!
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